PTA Purgatory

Does anyone really LIKE being a PTA mom? Or, is it something mothers of school-aged children are enforced to endure? For me, it's the latter.

For better or worse, I've become a PTA mom. I don't appear at every PTA-sponsored activity, but I admit to having attended every PTA meeting this year, so far. I hope I'm not one of THOSE superior-acting PTA moms, just someone trying to endorse my children's education. More than anything, it's a signal to my kids that school is important. When I show up at school and Valerie sees me, the light on her face is reward enough.

For now, I'll withstand the cronyism, cattiness, and mind-numbing crap the teachers ask me to do. I'll put on a smile (albeit sometimes a fake one), talk with people I wouldn't otherwise associate with and try to get by until my time is over - which is fifteen years from now. Why did I quantify that? FIFTEEN LONG YEARS ahead of me!

I guess, being a PTA mom helps me to get to know better my children's classmates' families. I may not normally associate with the majority of these people, but my daughters will likely enter these people's homes. To the extent it involves MY off-spring, I want to know what goes on behind closed doors.

Furthermore, I want to advocate for my kids. If I don't, who will? If I see something I like, I'd be happy to support it, even if it involves spending a day cutting hearts out of red felt. If I see something I don't like, I hope to constructively address the issue. Most of the time, I plan to quietly follow directions. I don't want to be one of those loud action-less complainers that I've already encountered so often. The complainer population is growing like guppies.

A few months ago, 20/20 did a segment entitled "Stupid In America" in which the reporters largely blamed teachers' unions and the US government for the failure of our education system. I can't say that I disagree with their report. But, I would like to add that parents, also, are failing their kids.

In my short involvement as a PTA-parent, I'm aghast by the lack of parental support and involvement at the school. So many have strong opinions on not just WHAT should be done, but also HOW things should be done. So, with all of these opinions, why is it that only a handful of parents appear at the monthly PTA meetings? Because it's a private school, do parents expect tuition dollars to buy everything? A checkbook doesn't buy parental involvement. Lack of parental support is a growing epidemic in our educational system.

Currently, I am preparing and recruiting parents to help make costumes for a school event. Yeah - it sucks. I can't sew and my creative ability is largely deficient. Fortunately, the costumes involve scissors, fabric glue, and duck tape (no joke). As I do this, I am tired of hearing, "How do you have time to do it?" "I don't like doing this kind of stuff." "I figure someone else will do it!"

First, I DON'T have a lot of extra time, but I MAKE the time. I opted not to watch Oprah today!
Second, I DON'T want to do this crap any more than anyone else does. But, maybe if we did it together, it would take less time and BOTH of our kids would be proud.
Third, no one else is going to do anything. Everyone has something to offer. And even if you don't have anything to offer, help is always welcome. Please leave the complaints at home.

When I recently lamented about the age-old PTA subject to my own mother, she offered, "Been there, done that. Better you than me!"

One day in the future, I look forward to telling my daughters the same.